Day Quite A While

Let's see, it's been...almost five months since the injury. 

I am walking all day every day without pain. 

I am doing yoga. Handstands are taking on a particularly interesting glow for me right now. Triconasana, not so much. But yoga is really helping with stretching out the scar tissue and the flexibility/range of motion. 

I am not running so much, although I have recently. It just doesn't feel good. My left knee is wonky from the slight impediment to my gait. However, a chiropractor will be contacted in the very near future so hopefully that can get somewhat worked out. 

The best time to run is after acupuncture, which is also EXTREMELY helpful. 

Western medicine did surgery on me and cobbled my ankle back together, but Eastern medicine is going to heal my joint. I strongly strongly suggest acupuncture for healing from sprains. Or healing from anything, really. It's subtle but strong. I go to this kinda sketchy place in Chinatown where there are a bunch of different non-english-speaking acupuncturists, whom I'm not at all sure are actually certified. One of them puts five needles in my ankle and that's it, another one does twenty, in my ankle and leg and forehead and hand and neck. Although he was treating me for a cough, too, so maybe that's why. He also went a little over the boundaries of professionalism while giving me a "complimentary" leg massage afterwards-- yanking my thong to the side so you can really get to my lymph nodes is frowned on by me and other women, buddy. So I plan to go back only on the weekends, when the 5-needle lady is there. 

Nonprofessional acupuncturists notwithstanding, acupuncture is the single most helpful thing I've done for my ankle so far. 

It is shrinking down, the left ankle, and I can wear cute shoes again. No heels yet, although that is my ultimate goal. Fuck running; I am more interested in regaining the ability to wear stilettos. The scars are there, though, especially the outer one, and I am poking at it daily to try to break up some scar tissue. 

I will return to physical therapy as soon as my medical insurance company stops dicking around with my coverage. Beaurocracy is an unsightly thing. I have had to make innumerable phone calls. Meanwhile I'm receiving $400 bills daily. F you, HIP. Get it together. 

I am having a hard time accepting that my body will never be the same again. My gorgeous, gorgeous right ankle and leg are the marker for what I once had and did not appreciate. I will always have a thicker left ankle; I will always have these scars. The leg does not taper elegantly as it once did. And I just have to accept that. 

At least I can walk, right? This may all be part of learning to love and appreciate my body, but I wish it wasn't so freaking permanent. Leave it up to me to have to endure pain, disability and disfigurement in order to gain some self-love.